Sunday, March 16, 2008

Science Watch: Microwaves - The Health Benefits of Clockwise Cooking

It has long been understood that cooking food in a microwave can impart health benefits due to the polymolecular energizing properties of the microwave field. Users of microwaves have for years reported an increased appetite for convenience foods, more tolerance of children's whining for a snack, and better control of their coffee temperature.

It has also been known that the "turntable" version of a microwave oven enhances these benefits by increasing the electron spin of food particles (Lambda-F). What has not been clear is whether the direction of turntable spin in a microwave oven has any impact on the benefits so derived.

Now a new study by Einma Dipthschlicht, of the Swiss Council on Science and Ham has caused health experts worldwide to look at microwave cooking in a new light (particularly since the old one had burnt out).

Recalling basic microwave oven design principles, you may note that many of the more modern devices are capable of switching the rotation direction of their turntables automatically with each use. This advanced feature, which no doubt kept many engineers up late nights to develop, goes largely un-noticed by the general microwaving public. Dipthschlicht's study has broad impact on the best operating methods for these devices.

As it turns out, electron spin is subtly but profoundly influenced by the rotational direction of the turntable in the microwave field. This is evidenced anecdotally by users who report their coffee gets hotter faster when the table is spinning clockwise (orientation: looking down from the top of the device). While this observation remains un-tested empirically, Dipthschlicht's study lends it some credence.

Dipthschlicht's hypothesis is that the electron spin gained from the microwave field is either enhanced or attenuated depending on the rotational direction of the turntable. Clockwise rotation increases electron spin (since most food has positive spin in the first place). Anti- or counterclockwise rotation retards the electron spin, negating some (but not all) of the health benefits of spin.

So how can you use this information to your own benefit? Obviously, until manufacturers re-engineer their products for clockwise-only rotation, you'll have to use the "dummy food" method before starting each cooking session - to toggle the oven so it cooks your actual food in the clockwise direction.

What's best to use as "dummy food"? Generally a small (microwave safe) cup of water will be easiest. There's been no evidence found that the amount of time you cook the "dummy food" has any effect on turntable direction, so a second or two will do it. If you repeatedly re-use the same water, be careful, however, that you don't dispose of this water down the drain - please be sure to follow your local guidelines for correct disposal of hazardous waste.

Yours Basking in the Light of Science and Reason,

LifeWrecked

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think Einma Dipthschlichts is related to a Dutch painter I once knew, named Noah Sjitt. I think he mentioned the Swiss Council on Science and Ham in connection with his Theory of Goudaism.

-Ann O'Nymous, PhD.
Professor of Extreme Cultural Studies
Frick University

Paul - Still Alive at 65 said...

LOL AnnieO!

I do recall reading something on the Theory of Goudaism, but I had forgotten the author's name, so thanks for reminding me!

I've often wondered if that theory has any bearing on the principles of rhrefrigerication or lactiformationism.

Thoughts, people? ;)

Ann O'Nymous said...

Definitely it relates to lactiformationism. Goudaism, interestingly enough, puts a clockwise spin on all circular cultural elements, thereby refuting Velveeta's Law. Perhaps I will research this; if so, I will post any relevant results at: http://www.doctorannonymous.blogspot.com

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Cheers
Robyn