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I'd like to introduce you all to one of my faithful friends, Tinnitus, or "Tinny" as I like to call him these days. Tinny has been at my side (right, that is) for about 40 years now.
In more recent times, Tinny's been expanding both his venue and his sonic repertoire - he now visits my left side often (while maintaining his vigilant guard of the right), and serenades me with both classical and modern musical compositions, overlaid on the steady "test tone" he's provided for me all these years.
Tinny's repertoire these days isn't limited to simple tones and music either. One of his favorite ways to entertain me on the left side is by challenging me to guess whether I'm hearing:
a) A refrigerator
b) A fan/ventilation system
c) A somewhat distant tractor
d) Muffled voices in another room
e) All of the above at once
Tinny is not generally an early riser, like I am, so usually I have to wait a few hours after waking until he starts his floor show. This I don't mind, since I know I can count on an entertaining day with my friend, and it's always fun trying to guess what "style" he'll use today. Of course, I can always stir Tinny from his slumber by exposing us to loud environments like a bus ride or a bowling alley. Then, being the good friend he is, he'll put extra effort (and volume) into doing his job well. He can also be roused by having an ENT poke around in my ear(s). Who wouldn't wake up if someone was rattling and banging in your bedroom?
One of the most interesting things about Tinny is that he accepts (musical) requests (when he's playing music). Sometimes, I must admit, I find his compositions rather droll - some of his favorites are endlessly repeating two, three, or five tone sequences. I've found that when I've had quite enough of a certain ditty, Tinny will take the hint, and accept my suggestions - with a little prodding. Fortunately for me, I have a vivid musical imagination, so I can "play" the melody in my head and Tinny will soon get the idea and start following along. It takes a little encouragement sometimes, but once he gets it, he'll be happy to play the song unbidden for many minutes, and sometimes even for hours.
Needless to say, it's not always chocolate and roses. Life with a professional noisemaker can be trying at times, particularly when I'd like to sleep, and as mentioned, Tinny keeps somewhat different hours than me. If he's feeling musical in the late evening, that doesn't really bother me much, as I'm musically inclined anyway - and I can often have my choice, as mentioned above.
However, if Tinny is feeling more "noisy" and less musical, and decides to try the guessing game (a-e above), sleeping can become a challenge. Good drugs (all legal, don't worry) are essential at these times.
Last night Tinny was on his mark with the noises, and while waiting for my 1-2-3-sleep combo to take effect, I'm ashamed to admit that I actually said this prayer:
Dear God, please give me nothing! I'll take totally deaf - I'll deal with it, whatever I have to do! Just give me some silent peace!
Well I don't know if God takes these sorts of prayers seriously, but I suppose I'll find out eventually. Meanwhile, it's me and Tinny, working out how to live together in "harmony".
Thanks for listening.
If you have a tinnitus story to share, please do feel free to comment!
LifeWrecked - out.
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6 comments:
I HATE tinnitus. When I am just getting over a vertigo attack, I get beautiful classical music. I can cope with that. However, as i get better, the tinnitus turns back to a relentless refrigerator on crack!
Remember those little toys - metal ones, shaped like beetles, that you used your thumb to make click clacking noises? Occasionally my tinnitus is like that - but really fast and loud. I've even asked other people around me if they can hear it as it's so loud how can they not???
No wonder Van Gogh tried to cut off his ear!
Cheers
Robyn in NZ
Thanks for a wonderful co-miseration Robyn! And yes, I never would have thought of them again until you mentioned the clicky beetles! Ah, when life was simple...
I've been sitting here reading this and listening to my right ear whine like an early morning alarm. That's its usual and truth be told, I'm used to it, but since I'm reading your blog I've become aware of the noise-- like one would be of blinking if reading about it. What I hate most is at night I get a dripping sound. It reminds me of the sound I used to get when I had water in my ear that needed to come out-- only I don't have water in my ear. I haven't been around water. This dripping sound has been going on for decades-- every night. Some nights are worse than others, but like the right ear tone I'm mostly used to it unless it acts up more than usual. I'm not losing much sleep over it. Unfortunately, I am not lucky enough to hear music. :-(
Interesting how thinking of things can make them more obvious. I've "heard" of people conquering tinnitus through meditation (totally focusing on something else), and I do know when I'm very focused on a task, my tinnitus seems non-existent. We make our own reality in some ways. ;)
Don't feel too sad about not hearing the music KW - mine isn't anything like a symphony orchestra - the best it can do is something like a church choir - and though I have some "license" to control it, I can never turn it off.
I began to suffer from tinnitus at a young age from a sudden hearing loss problem. As an ear, nose and throat specialist, I researched and developed a nutritional supplement that has given my life some joy again. Sorry if it sounds a promo, but it worked for me. http://serenitytinnitusrelief.com/
I have a friend who would grind his teeth so loud that it would make everyone near him upset. We did not know of tinnitus at the time. So when he at last went to see a doctor. He found out that he had tinnitus. The doctor gave him a masking system and some natural remedies to help ease his tinnitus. Now he does not grind his teeth any more. So we are all happy with our friend now.
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